Name: Amy Gow
Website: www.amygow.blogspot.com
How would you describe yourself: mother, birth activist, doula
1. What change(s) do you want to see in birth?
I want to see a total transformation in the way our society treats women and babies before, during, and after birth. I want to see nurses, doctors and midwives abandon questionable treatments and the assumption that every woman is a walking risk factor. I want every woman to have the support of a wise, loving midwife or doula who helps her to face her fears about motherhood and birth and who understands that birth is as much a spiritual as a physical act.
2. What people/places/philosophies/things do you envision being some of the catalysts in birth change?
Thanks be to the Universe for the internet. I think it’s been the single most important influence on women’s alternative birth choices for several years now. It can be incredibly hard to find people in your circle of peers who support alternatives in birth, but you go online and find a wealth of information and support. From there, women are being inspired to shift paradigms and are finding the courage to speak up for change. I actually think that there are many people/places/philosophies influencing and causing birth change, but I think the majority of women are accessing that information via the internet.
3. What is the first thing that needs to change with how the average person views natural birth? What are your ideas (big and small) to help this change?
I think the average person sees natural birth as traumatic to the mother and extremely dangerous to the baby. They need to keep hearing the message that birth is a normal physiological event for the female half of our species, just as it is for every other mammal on the planet. They need to know that birth is not just a physical act, but a great spiritual one that brings one life into this world and transforms a woman in the process. Women can be uplifted, strengthened and empowered by their births or they can come away with the impression that their bodies are defective and they must be saved, yet again, by a patriarchal system.
I think there are two ways of going about change. One way is to keep putting our stories out there and correcting misinformation in the media. The other way, which I favour, is going out in our communities and making a difference one woman at a time, by serving them with love and compassion and offering our encouragement and information. We also need to help women build supportive communities in real life that focus on respecting each other’s informed choices. What mothers and their partners need most is help and support with the practical, every day aspects of pregnancy, birth and parenting, so I think that peer-to-peer support is the way of the future. This will happen as more and more women birth at home, breastfeed their babies full term, and really integrate their children into all aspects of their lives.
4. What is the best advice you would give a pregnant mama who is looking into her birth choices?
Read everything you can from the wise modern midwives who passionately support unhindered birth and the rights of mothers. Consider a homebirth. Hire a midwife or doula who is more committed to a mother’s informed choice than protocols or rules, even if you end up with a rare medical problem during your pregnancy and end up birthing with an obstetrician. When I was pregnant with my first baby, I found excellent information and a lot of confidence while studying articles by Gloria Lemay, Sarah Buckley, Michel Odent, Mary Cronk, The Association of Radical Midwives in the UK, Ronnie Falcao’s Midwife Archives, and articles in Midwifery Today.
5. If you could give a few words of advice to all the women (even those not pregnant) that haven’t found their voices yet, what would it be?
Immerse yourself in women’s history- especially the way that the medical community has treated women over the past 200 years. Mourn for the African American slave women who were cruelly used for years as experimental fodder for the founders of “modern” gynecology and obstetrics. Learn about the origin of the term “old wives’ tales”. Know that medical associations discredited midwives in order to corner the market on women’s births. This ultimately caused the migration from home-based healthcare for the entire family to allopathic, hospital-based care for every aspect of life. Learn all about the use of “twilight sleep” during the 20th century. When you get a real understanding for how the past has shaped our current experience, there’s a good chance you will have more confidence speaking out against current practices and making alternate healthcare choices. I actually think that creates the foundation for women to take charge of all other aspects of their lives.
6. What encouraging advice would you give anybody in birth (mama or any birth worker) when faced with that seems like the present “doom and gloom” situation?
I would suggest that they take the long view. I used to become depressed and despondent when I looked at trends in childbirth. Indeed, in the decade I’ve been a birth activist, I’ve seen the rates of induction, c-section and epidural use go up in my local area. But there are reassuring signs of change. In my home province, there were several years where the number of planned homebirths was in the low single digits. In the past few years, however, there have been dozens of homebirths attended by traditional birth attendants, friends or unassisted. When I started offering my childbirth support services six years ago, I was attending two or three births a year and there were a couple of other doulas doing the same. This year, I’ve attended 12 births, and there are several doulas for parents to choose from. Our rates of breastfeeding initiation have risen considerably over the past 20 years. I could get frustrated but I find it helps me tremendously to focus on these small improvements and on the impact I have personally on the women and families I serve. To see just one woman have a wonderful birth and early mothering experience is enough to encourage me to keep going.
7. What do you think “We” can do to help women find their truth, their trust and their responsibility in birth?
I think the single greatest thing we can do is to stop judging other women and start treating each other with boundless compassion. The patriarchy has been successful in turning women against each other and destroying community, by cementing the idea in our society that women are hysterical, untrustworthy and unreliable. I see this legacy in the current, very polarized debate between birth workers: technology vs. hands-off birth, regulating midwifery or not, unassisted birth is perfectly safe/is extremely risky, and more. All too often, we are fighting birth fear with more fear-based statements, which just leaves women confused and defensive. I challenge birth workers to watch their language so they can share the enormously positive effects of unhindered birth in a way that inspires women to look at their choices. We can live our truths every day and give women good information, but then we have to step back and respect them as they make their own decisions. Instead of treating others as we want to be treated, I challenge us to communicate and listen to other women and treat them as THEY want to be treated, supporting them as they want to be supported. When we speak truth from a loving, confident place, we’re more likely to be heard and more likely to have an impact. Thank you for giving me a space to share these thoughts!
